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Hey, TSA, I Can Save You Some Time!

Today, John Tyner became my hero.

If you haven’t heard the story yet, John Tyner went to the airport in San Diego, hoping to fly to South Dakota to visit his father-in-law. Now the inaptly-named Transportation Security Administration plans for investigate him for refusing to allow them to “investigate” him.

Hey, TSA, I can save you time here on your investigation: A member of the allegedly-free United States of America didn’t want you to sexually molest him just because he was planning to visit family.

Sexual molestation is exactly what they intended to do with him. If I touched you, or anyone else, in the way they touch American chattel when it goes to the airport, I would go to jail.

Plain and simple. No ifs, ands, or buts — if I touch your butt, I’m toast even if you don’t slap me. Hell, I’m trying to help a man right now who has to register as a sex offender after a felony conviction for pinching a woman’s butt in a bar after too much to drink!

But if I really were a sex pervert and I wanted to make money as a sex pervert, all I have to do is make sure that I’ve not ever been caughtmolesting anyone before I go and apply for a job working for the Transportation Security Administration.

Dan Gillmor over at Salon asks, “Are we growing up?”

One can only hope. For too long now, we have blindly accepted whatever the government tells us we have to do “for safety purposes.” We have become a nation not of People, but of Sheep. We are Submitizens.

Frankly, it’s well past time for a revolt.

What most people don’t realize is that the scanners the government is providing — free — to pedophiles and other sexual perverts working under the guise of protecting the American public really are pornographic video cameras.

I haven’t flown since I can’t remember when. I refuse. (I wonder if the TSA is going to sue me now, for not allowing them to sexually assault me?) While I miss my family back east, I don’t miss being able to walk through a public place without having a stranger grab and fondle my balls.

What we need are a few thousand more people to follow John Tyner’s example. Maybe then we can restore a little sanity and the perverts working at TSA will have to find some other way to get their rocks off.

And now you know why they want to sue John Tyner for refusing to be sexually battered.

They’re afraid you’ll be the next to refuse.